Wedding Dresses for Older Women

I don't consider you to be old if you are over 40. Many women go through years of college and get advanced degrees before they settle down. Other women like to wait for the right guy and have their careers in place before they get married for the first time.

Or, maybe, you are over 40 and you are on your second (or third) try. If you don't hit it right with your first marriage, it is quite likely that you are going to get remarried and keep on trying until you find Mr. Right...or Mr. Fabulously-nice-guy-who-likes-your-kids. Well, Americans and Canadians are an optimistic bunch. If at first they don't succeed, they try, try again. And, I think that's a good thing.

I was recently remarried at age 52, so I'll give you what I think is the latest and greatest, current advice.

If this is your first wedding, you can wear whatever you want. You can wear a fou-fou wedding-cake gown and have ushers and bridesmaids and flower girls and whatever your little happy heart desires. You can wear white, you can wear pink, you can wear black, you can wear red. It's your choice.

If it's your second wedding (or third or fourth or you are competing with Zsa Zsa Gabor) you can wear anything you want, except for a blusher veil. A blusher veil is that thing that covers your face.

Other than that, white is accepted as a second-time wedding color. I wore a light gold colored dress for my remarriage at 52. I actually think I looked pretty good for being so "old". I didn't feel right wearing stark white (and bright white is not a good color on me), but if you like white, I say, "It's your party and you should be happy."

I also believe that you should not invite anyone who cares what color dress you wear. If they aren't happy for your new-found happiness, "Let them eat cake...their own cake at their own house."

You can wear a short white dress if you are over 40, over 50, over 60 or whatever. I am giving you permission to wear a white dress of any length. If your family doesn't approve, let me know and I'll tell them about life in the modern world.

Your people should be happy for you. Your children should be happy for you. If your adult children are giving you a hard time, let them know that you have seen a lawyer and you've signed a prenup. If you own a house or you have other assets, you have talked to a lawyer, haven't you? I don't care how much you love this guy...you must ask your lawyer about protecting your assets.

If you are totally old school, you can wear a pastel-colored suit. This is how precise, punctilious, priggish, and puritanical brides dressed for their second weddings back in the 50s. That was before people (mostly Baby Boomers) decided that we should only follow rules that made sense.

These days, you should follow your own rules for your wedding dress.